Citizenship Review
18/08/2010
- Life
The thing that has sparked this particular rant off is that we are currently living in an environment where punishing everyone for the sins of the few seems to be how we now legislate for things in this country. A great example is alcohol. I enjoy a good old knees up but according to the law because some people enjoy tearing up the high street on a weekend I’m not entitled to cheap alcohol. That’s hardly fair, is it?
OK, I need a term for the people that ruin it for everyone else. I’m going to call them the ‘idiots’. Previous examples of right-wing political groups have always persecuted the wrong people. Why go for the Jewish or specific African tribes when there are the ‘idiots’ amongst us. Idiots exist in every walk of life. They can be any age, any colour, any religion, and any class. People should only ever be judged by their actions.
I’m proposing a new citizenship system that is actually ‘fair‘ and not the David Cameron definition of ‘fair’. You’ll have to excuse the lack of political lingo as this proposal won’t be hiding behind any blue sky management spiel but will be in plain and simple English. Are you ready for this? It’s good!
When you are born in this country everyone is given a card. If you come here from abroad and pass our citizenship criteria then you also receive a card. The card in practice will be a little more complicated than this but for simplicity, we’ll say that when you receive it the card has a ‘green’ status. So to start with it’s a level playing field for everyone. Now, as long as I’ve been a good boy when I scan my card at the checkout for booze it sees it’s ‘green’ and lets me have the discount. Now, for the medium idiot (a bit of a wally) who maybe has an ASBO and a history of violence would have an ‘amber’ status. Unfortunately for him, due to his previous misdemeanours would pay a higher levy on his alcohol. You can probably work out what comes next. The big idiot (Mayor of Idiotsville) who has spent time in prison for repeated offenses. He would have a ‘red’ status on his citizenship card which would prohibit him from buying booze completely. This example is specific to booze, I like booze, but it could be used for other luxury items.
I understand that people can change so this will be a two-way system. The Mayor of Idiotsville can get in the ‘green’ again by being a good citizen. Cameron is currently promoting a scheme to keep the local services running on a voluntary basis. This would be a perfect way to gain points and become a good citizen again.
I would also give more powers to the Police by allowing them to punish citizens by having the authority to set ‘amber’ or ‘red’ statuses. This is where we would need to expand upon the traffic light system, to a more granular point system. Perhaps something like this.
Green – 100 – 75 points
Amber – 75 – 50 points
Red – 50 – 0 points
The High Courts would have the authority to give 0-100 point reductions. The Police would be able to give up to 10-point fines on the spot. These on-the-spot fines would need to be authorised by two Officers.
There are a few holes in the proposal. A physical card-based system will always have problems, just look at the Labour identity card farce. So maybe some kind of thumbprint scan? Getting it passed the loony left big brother-fearing brigade would also hold this up. I don’t think I’m suggesting anything too crazy though. I’m just sick to the teeth of the generic one rule for everyone approach. The majority of people aren’t complete imbeciles, so please please please give us the credit we deserve. I know a bag of nuts ‘contains nuts’, I know I shouldn’t drink bleach, and that you shouldn’t allow children to play with paper shredders.
That’s it. Vote for me for PM. By the way, I do not and have not ever read the Daily Mail.