The winner is Sepp Blatter

No, not the competition to find the world’s biggest numpty. No, unfortunately, this competition is for who will be in charge of running the greatest sport. He opposes technology which our beloved game is crying out for. He belittles women by stating that the women’s game could benefit ‘if they wore shorter shorts’. And thinks homosexuals should  ‘refrain from sexual activity’ while in Qatar. What century are we living in?

Like everything in life, I try to look at things from a neutral perspective. I’m sure a lot of people believe the English are now coming across as sour grapes due to our disastrous world cup bid. But hang on, if Qatar had bribed their way to victory then why even allow us to enter? What a waste of time, money and Bryl Cream (remember David Beckham was involved). It’s good to see Australia (another stung nation) is demanding the money it spent on its bid back.

I watched the poor FA representative say his bit in front of the baying wolves amongst the FIFA delegates. Then countries like Cyprus started sticking the knife in. I assume this is revenge for us tearing up Ayia Napa since the 90s. I can’t wait to give all these nations the bird when Sepp Blatter and his Forth Reich movement comes sweeping into their nation. OK probably gone a bit too far there, but there are some cultural points to be raised. Our nation has a live by the sword die by the sword approach to what we deem to be fair. Maybe a guilt trip since our empirical past but at the end of the day a good attitude to adopt. This is why we seem to commit so many troops to campaigns around the world to liberate them from tyranny (nothing to do with oil, purely coincidence)

To bring fairness to the World Cup process it should do a cycle globally so that everyone gets a chance to host. FIFA should set out the requirements to be considered to host the thing. This would include stadiums, travel networks, hotels and policing. The globe should be divided into 4 sections and all of the eligible countries for each section should be put into a hat. A nation from each section of the globe is pulled out at random. The 1st section winner will be the next world cup host, the 2nd section winner will be the host of the world cup in 8 years’ time and so on and so forth. These nations are then excluded in the next round of World Cup draws. If you make a complete hash of the tournament then you miss a go. I’m not at all upset that Russia and Qatar have the World Cup gig. They’ve never had it before so that’s fair. The process to get to this result has to change though.

How can the current system of schmoozing overly corrupt bureaucrats into voting for you be the process we currently adopt? FIFA is an organisation that apparently is built on ‘fair play‘?!? I guess ballot papers with 1 fucking name on it is also fair. Even if everyone abstained from voting I’m fairly certain Sepp would have voted and ‘Yeh! I won again!’ would be the scream at the end. Sepp Blatter is a complete hypocrite that we are now stuck with until the next FIFA elections. Given the choice of standing up against Sepp and his cronies or toeing the line I know which one I’m in favour of!